The Suitable Boy

This morning I was talking to my dad.He is so worried about my sister getting married.Typical dads. He kept telling me that I should talk to her, ask her if she likes someone or if he should start looking for a “suitable boy”. He said he also wanted to talk to DH about it and discuss what all needs to be done . I was suddenly reminded of the time when DH met my dad the first time.We had been seeing each other for about 6-7 months then. And DH had been asking me to marry him almost everyday.I dared him.. to ask my dad for my hand if he was really serious. And he did!
After every date,he used to come to drop me .He would drop me a little away from home and leave. But that day,he insisted on dropping me all the way home.I thought he meant – the colony gate. But no,he meant all the way home!!! So, he came to drop me.I said Bye at the door.. he rang the bell!Dad opened the door.I panicked!! He coolly introduced himself and asked my dad if he could come in. Asked dad if he could talk to him…I was staring at him with my mouth wide open. Dad told me to go and “make tea”..I want to talk to him! “But papa”… “Go!!!” Gulp!I left. They spoke..I don’t know what.I guess DH told him about his job, future plans,family and of course asked him if he could marry his daughter!!!
Dad said sure if your parents are OK with it,I will support you both. But,I will not willingly let my daughter marry into a family where she is not welcome! That’s it..Then the talk was over. Tea was ready.. we all sat down and had tea like he was a casual friend of mine. No one looking at the scene from outside would have guessed that this guy had just asked my dad for my hand in marriage!!Two cool guys sitting comfortably, while a girl squirms nervously!
A few months later, DH changed jobs, got a better job. He called up and told my dad that he had spoken to his parents and if my dad wanted he could talk to them. My dad called his father ,who refused to talk-point blank!! in his words-” You take care of your daughter ,I will take care of my son”.And he hung up!!! That’s where DH lost some points. My dad was sure then.. that he is taking me for a ride . He started looking for a suitable boy! He told me-“I met the guy of your choice and see what happened.. Now will you meet someone that I like?I don’t want you wasting your life if S and his family are not ready.” So,I went to meet his “boy”.DH was so tensed..My cell phone was on silent mode. By the time the meeting was over and I checked my cell phone, there were at least 20 missed calls!! The moment I picked up his next call, he barked into my ear-“Did you like him?” hahhaha.. Of course I didn’t. DH met my dad once again in an attempt to pacify him.. but he was still not fully convinced. It took another 6 months and several ultimatums( If I don’t marry her, I wont marry at all) and intervention from so many people to convince DH’s parents. They are still not exactly happy.. but DH has slowly and steadily climbed to the position of “best match for my little girl”.
I may still be just the-girl-who-stole-our- son , the daughter-in-law.. but he has definitely moved on from the son-in-law to the son!He is now the son,my dad never had. Even the smallest of decisions, when my dad used to earlier consult me n sis, now he includes DH too. In fact,I am a wee bit Jealous when I say this that more often than not, his advice is the one most sought.Even when my sister has something important to discuss( new job, new cell phone, new computer), she calls up and says.. Di, give the phone to Jeeju! LOL!
When I call up my aunt or grandmother, they are more concerned about how he is doing and if I am taking care of him( hello… I am the daughter)…Ohh well,he is a sweetie and he deserves it!
And today when my dad spoke about my sister’s marriage and how he wanted to discuss the whole deal with DH,I literally had tears in my eyes. We have come so far, he has made a distinct place in my family.
Whether I gained a new family or not is still debatable..But He has surely got himself a brand new family.. a family that’s absolutely crazy about him.
Here’s what they have to say for you-
“Beta,I am very proud of you! You deserve all the success and all the happiness.God Bless you!”
Jeeju,You Rock!”
P.S.- Dad is not very net savvy and sis is too busy with her new job.. so I had to call them up and ask them to say something for DH,so that I could put it in this post!

Posted on June 6, 2007, in Happy Birthday, Happy Times. Bookmark the permalink. 5 Comments.

  1. Wow – what a nice love story!!! So cool! And so happy it all turned out so nicely! Brave of your husband to have gone up to your dad cold turkey and asked him for your hand in marriage! You really have a good story for your children and grand children! 🙂 It’s like in the movies! Hope you get accepted too in the same way by his family!Nice happy post!

  2. What a lovely post…reminds me of when the husband decided I should meet the family…was never welcome, being of a different faith, but he stuck to me through thick thin and suicide threats. And here are we 12 years later…

  3. Congrats to S for finding all the love and support of his loving new family! Good luck to your sis for ‘finding and suitable boy’ :)AW

  4. Wow!! A very Nice post.

  5. Noon- How are you doing ? Hehehe yes ours is a real filmy story,our friends still tease us that we made it up!Kiran-WOW! 12 yrs..I hope our 6 years turn to 12 soon and 12 to 24..:)AW- My sis would kill me if she reads this post..and as of now would run 10 miles away at the mention of “the suitable boy”Thanx for reading Sunita

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