Monthly Archives: March 2009
My Dearest Aadi,
Happy Birthday !You,my dear,are turning Two today.And as I sit down to write this letter to you,I am lost.I try to remember you as a new born and I can’t.I try to remember your first wobbly steps and I can’t.When I look at your pics from a few months ago,it seems like someone else.Yes,that’s how much you have changed.Your Papa and I have spent most of the last month,wondering,how much our baby has grown up.
If your first year with us,went by very fast,then the second zoomed by even before we said your name.While the first year meant sleepless nights,midnight feeds,countless diaper changes and much more ,the second year was all fun.It was fun,watching you grow.You grew from a crawler to a walker and even runner.Aww,sweetie,we could watch you run,forever-your chubby baby legs,going fast,your little baby butt,swinging with each leap,you are delight to our eyes.
Not only did you learn to eat yourself,you do it with such style.You insist on eating with a spoon,you wont touch your food,till you are not handed a spoon,and then promptly dig in with your hands.Its mesmerising,watching you pick a tiny morsel with 2 perfect baby fingers and drop it into your mouth so gracefully.You insist on using a knife and fork for eating your eggs,and use them with perfect ease.I am so proud of you.
We both are.And though Papa may get angry sometimes or rough-house with you,he is a mush-ball,where you are concerned.And you,my darling,know that, better than me.You hug him,you kiss him or you just sulk and tell him how angry you are,and he is ready to give you the moon and the stars.
For most part of your first year and early last year,you were a clingy baby.So many times,that was a cause of irritation or embarrassment for me or your Papa-imagine,him coming to pick you up and you screaming,murder!Everyone told us,it was because,you saw only me all day.But,over the last few months,you have bloomed into an independent social bee.You love being around other people.You love interacting with others and now others ask us,if you go to a play school and we proudly answer,that you are home with me.
When I watch you,walk confidently,in a crowded room,my heart swells with pride.When you have the attention of the crowd,you do your thing-smile your sweet smile,put up a cute show,almost unconsciously and keep your audience interested.You are natural star and you know it too.But its your innocence that makes you the rock star.
And you rock my world.I try hard but cannot remember life without you.Sometimes,when you are awake and chattering non-stop,I wish for a moment of quiet.But,when you are sleeping,I find myself waiting for you to wake up or even wanting to wake you up*gasp*.After that initial moment of quiet,the silence becomes uncomfortable and I find myself missing that chit-chat.In these two years,you have taken over my thoughts,my mind and my heart completely.The love that I feel for you,I can’t explain even to you..May be you’ll know it when you are a mom(By the time you read this,you would have probably heard this line,in so many different tones,in many different contexts.) I used to roll my eyes,the same way you would be doing then.
But even if I rolled my eyes,I always wanted to be a mom.Always.Even when I was fifteen or was it thirteen.And I knew that I wanted to be a mom to a baby girl.I always wanted a girl.Like most teenage girls,I wanted a girl to dress her up in pretty clothes. After your Nani passed away,I wished even more to have a daughter,to have a mother-daughter relationship-it didn’t matter that I would be the mother,this time round.My desire for a daughter,grew with each year,that you didn’t appear.Now,I realise,that you took so long to come,because,perfection takes time.Yes,my darling,you are perfect..even with your little imperfections.What imperfections,you ask?Well,your temper for one 🙂 You of the volatile temper and you who is quick to say,”Sorry”.. Yes,you are perfect.
Stay the same baby girl..I know you have a lot of growing up to do,I want you to be all grown up,but you’ll always be my little baby.You are getting closer to your Papa,now,but I’ll always know you more -just a tad more,for those nine months,when you were just mine-for all to know but only for me to feel.You clung to him,again today,when you were sleepy and I watched,partly with love,partly with envy and he asked me,if I was scared of losing my baby to him..I said,Naah..Little does he know,how close to truth he was or may be he does.
Now,when I try to remember the days when I was pregnant,or even your first few months,it seems so far off in time.My memories are a little fuzzy but one thing is crystal clear and that is the feeling of being overwhelmed,by the love I feel for you. Tonight,as I type this fervently,while sneaking furtive glances at your sleeping form,I feel the same.And I feel bad for being hard on you,at bed-time,every night.It breaks my heart even more when you snuggle close to me,as I get in bed and then,I know,we are OK..We are friends again 🙂 And the only reason,I write this today,is because,that’s how I want us to stay always..As friends.I want to be the one you come to,with whatever is on your mind.And if for some reason,I am not,show me this post and remind me.And if for some reason,you don’t feel like being friends ,see this post and remember how much I love you.
We just put up a birthday banner,with your favorite Pooh and filled your favorite corner with your oldest toys and balloons..I hope when,you wake up,you are happily surprised.Hearing that “WowWWW” is the inspiration for so many things,that we do.
Jaanu,may your life be always filled with sunny days and happy moments.May you always be happy,As happy as you have made us.You are our lives sweetest blessing.
God bless you,My Angel.
Happy Birthday,Baby girl!
Love you Always..
Aadya is turning into a daddy’s girl,slowly and steadily.Everyday,the first thing she says,when she wakes up is,”Papa Offish”.Then,start the pretend phone calls,spread through out the day.When Papa calls,Mamma can’t hang up,without the Pipette talking to him.Come evening and the Pipette,peeks out the window,every few minutes,to see if Papa is home.And when he does arrive home,he is greeted with a big squeal and she jumps into his arms,starting her non-stop narrative of the day.
He is not allowed to put her down,even for a minute,till she doesn’t finish.It doesn’t matter if Papa might need to use the toilet or wash his face.All that has to wait.
Then,Papa is in-charge of the dinner,teeth brushing,Shower(depending on the Pipette’s mood,mamma or papa are summoned).Sometimes a car-ride is demanded too..and Papa being the good one,always obliges,well almost always.
Then,bed-time masti is always Papa-Pipette time,when mamma is pushed to the sidelines.They talk,they laugh,they jump,they pretend-laugh too.Sometimes,they cuddle with Mamma too..and the Pipette,makes sure that she is between Mamma and Papa,clinging to Papa.
On Weekends,the first thing she asks,as always is Papa Offish?When S says,no baby no office today..the mood is set.The Pipette has a big smile on her face.Most days,we give her a bottle in bed,and laze around.But,Pipette is too restless to stay in bed.She starts pulling Papa,saying Utho Utho(wake up) till he doesnt get up from the bed.She even brings our glasses to us,specially opening Papa’s,so all he has to do is put it on.
Here’s some exchanges between Papa and Pipette-
When Papa is just back from work-
Pipette- Papa Papa,Maana.(Maana= slapping/hitting)
Papa-Kaun mara mere baby ko?(who hit my baby)
Pipette- Mamma..Maana Maana,Pipette cry park fwing mamma push bala shcared….and so on.
Pipette-no no Fwing!
The Pipette says all S words with an F or SH sound.So swing is fwing,spider is fider,scared is shared,santa is shanta,you get the gist.
Mamma was hiding somewhere,laughing,but of course,she didn’t want to upset the Pipette:)
Pipette throwing toys,Papa pretending to scold her,while winking at mamma
Pipette-No-No-No No Daati (No scolding)
Papa-Ok meri Ma(ok mom!)
Pipette- (runs to Mamma)- Ma,Ma
In the kitchen,Pipette opening the cupboard
Papa-Kya ho raha hai?(What are you doing?)
Papa-What? Shaafing kya hai?(what is Shaafing)
Pipette- Shaaf Papa,Wash,shaaf.(Shaaf=Saaf,in hindi=clean)
Papa and Mamma both were stumped at this one.How does a child so small know to put -ing after the word..
At the grocery store,Pipette wants to pick up a packet of speciality cheese,
Papa-No,we are not buying that cheese
Papa-no no you dont want it..we are not buying that.
Pipette-Big scowl on the wee face-Pipette Angee..
Papa-olle baby..no angry..
Pipette- no Pipette Angee
Papa(to Mamma)-Should we buy the cheese?
This little princess has her Papa wrapped around her little finger.
Sometimes,some things happen that you just cannot explain.Somethings that leave you breathless,with excitement and nervous in anticipation.Somethings that you realise,you are better off accepting,just like that-Unexplained.
Something like that happened to me,in late October,2009.My dad was going through a very very tough period.And it felt like the situation was just getting worse by the minute.We were all very worried and near depression.The feeling of helplessness pushes you into a dark place.The only way out seemed like prayers.
I am big believer of Sai Baba.I truly believe and Thank Baba for Aadya and her safe arrival.I had my copy of Sai Satcharitra with me,even in the OT.I decided to fast on Thursdays in Sai Baba’s honour till the terrible time didn’t pass.Sometime that week,I had a dream.
In my dream,a soft spoken lady,was talking to me.Her voice was so sweet,that you would forget about everything else.I couldn’t even see her face.All I remember is seeing a rich green and red haze around her.And I remember her words very clearly,as if she is saying them,as I type-“Guruvar toh theek hai,par Devi ka bhi kuch karo“[Fasting on Thursday is fine,but you should do something for the Goddess]…And I woke up.
My heart was beating fast and I was filled with excitement,of a good kind.It was a good change from the dull depressing state I was in.
I told S,when we woke up,he was intrigued too.After a while,had a long chat with my sister,she was surprised too.Then,I emailed my trusted friends,and Kiran of karmic kids suggested Vaibhav lakshmi vrat.Someone else suggested Santoshi Mata Vrat.Some how as soon as I heard about Vaibhav Lakshmi Vrat,I felt it was what the lady in my dream hinted at.
Anyway,I looked up online and found a Devi’s Temple somewhere in a far-flung suburb of Melbourne.Coincidentally,it was a Friday and we decided to go there.But S was late coming back from work and we couldn’t.The next day,on Saturday,we set off in the evening to the temple.We had plenty of time,before the temple close at 8.As luck would have it,we got lost and we got lost and we got lost again.My heart was sinking.It was 7.45pm and we were nowhere close to the temple..I had all but given up hopes of reaching on time.Excatly at 7.50 pm,we saw the sign to the temple and reached there 5 minutes before closing time.
It was as if the priest was just waiting for us.There were exactly three bananas left -which he gave us.We spoke to the priest and I told him about my dream.He just smiled and as soon as I asked him about Vaibhav Lakshmi Vrat,he quietly went and brought a book from the cupboard-it was the Vaibhav Lakshmi Vrat Katha[The story of Vaibhav Lakshmi Vrat].He said its for me.
While at the temple,Aadya looked at the Devi’s Lion and went and touched it lovingly calling it Puppy.Normally,when she calls her teddies Puppy,we correct her and she says the right name atleast then..but this time she was adamant and called it Puppy.”Her name is a name of Godess Durga,who rides the Lion”,S pointed out.
Anyway,around this time,I don’t remember,if it was before or after my dream,someone told my sister,that my dad should pray to the Godess,She is the only one who would help him.This was another co-incidence.It was just a happy co-incidence that Aadya was named after the Godess,quiet by chance -we picked the name thinking it meant the first one..it was only later that we realised the religious connection.
The day after the visit to the temple,things started looking up …making my belief even stronger.
Spirituality is something,isn’t it?when you are in a happy place spiritually, the calm you experience is unimaginable.
I have to stop now…I will write more..in a while
Its been long since I put up anything on this blog.But that doesn’t mean that I have abandoned this blog.Its just that,I don’t have any more finished projects to display.
Also,we moved houses and we didn’t have phone or internet connection for more than 10 days after we moved in.I cannot tell you,how disoriented and “out-of-touch” with the world I felt.
Anyway,all’s well now.
Now for my current projects-
1) I am making more of those hats- for 2 friends.
2) I started knitting a sweater from my little girl.This will be the first sweater I finish all by myself.My speciality in knitting is blankets and scarves.
This is the yarn that I am using for it.
Isn’t it Beautiful?I have had it for 6 months now..Made a hat with it,tried crochet and finally started knitting.
Like what you see?Check back in a few days to see the finished result.
Its Friday..Time for the weekly weightloss update.
I had regained 400 gms over the weekend..We had friends over for two of the three days(it was a long weekend) -so there was eating and drinking and no excercise..
From Tuesday I increased the walks….Made the Pipette sit on one side of the see-saw and pushed the other with my hand,taking turns with the right and left hand.
At weigh-in today-I had lost the 400 gms!!!
Total weight-loss so far- 2.8 kgs
February has only 28 days and Aadya turns 2 on the 30th of March..So,she is almost two..technically 23 months now.:)
We moved to our new house on the 28th and I think Aadya has got a new leash on life.Really.I heard her squeal happily,when she saw the house.I heard her excited squeals when S played ball with her.My baby is almost a big girl now.In her mind,I think she already is.From pointing at things to saying some words,she has moved on speaking two word sentences..and even attempting to string more words together.Like the other day,she was walking between the husband’s legs and giggling.I asked her”What’s up Aadya?” And she said,”Aadya walking shidePapa Paiir(shide=Aadyaspeak for inside or outside,whatever is applicable; paiir=legs)
Its interesting to see the little helpless baby evolve so much..but it breaks my heart to see that she is all grown up now.
There was a time,when she just wouldn’t let me get out of her sight.But now,its like her little legs have a mind of their own..actually,I think she knows now that she can wander away from me and the sky won’t fall.Now this is both good and bad.At home,I can have my momentary peace,while she does her own thing.But bad,when we are out somewhere,say,in the library.She finds books that she likes and brings them,not to me..to other women(read moms) in the kids section and insists on them reading it,saying Peez to sweeten the deal.And all my attempts at getting her to sit down with me,are a lost cause.She looks at me like I am a strange WOMAN!
The new independent Diva,has a choice in everything..be it her meals-the day I make only roti and no rice,she wants Bhaatu.The day,there is no roti,she wants Roti.And the day that I make both,she wants Patata or Dosha!There is no pleasing this child,I tell you.That’s another story..that she has to eat what is on her plate.I tell her,she’ll get the missing item after she finishes..most days she is a sport and finishes it.By then she is too full to remember.She likes to pick her own clothes too.We are in the Pink phase still..but she has a select clothes that she likes in the non-pink stack too.Even if we ask her,what to wear,she answers Pink..and ensures that the shirt or top is pink!Not only that,she has taken to dressing and undressing herself.So,don’t be surprised if you walk into AadyaLand and are greeted by a naked child running around or one wearing an inside out dress.
She has her favorites in DVDs too.The ones topping the chart are –Ghatotkach,Adventures of Pooh,Hanuman-1 &2,Hum tum,Salaam namaste.
The Salaam Namaste Songs were played so many times,before the DVD stopped working..But,since Ghattu(ghatotkach)arrived on the scene,all other videos have moved down the chart. When she wants to watch it,she says Gattu putit peez? What is it with the kids these days..so polite-whatever happened to demanding from your parents,with reckless abandon.
Every time,we fill her bottle,she wants to hold the cap and she takes it very seriously,this cap holding business.God Forbid,if you dont give it to her to hold,big tears appear miraculously on her cheeks and you hear holdit holdit in halting baby voice,till she doesn’t get to holdit!
Aadya has alway enjoyed being read to.But now,she sits down with her toys and opens a book and reads to them.Ofcourse,she can’t read.But,if you didn’t listen to clearly,you’d think she was actually reading the story.What she is mostly saying is…”one gibberish gibberish mamma bear..fast hot.gibberish gibberish knockknonk..shleeping BEARS!”She is actually reading the Goldilocks and three Bears from her memory.I am amazed at the things she remembers.Its been more than one month,since we visited Aneela and baby Arhaan.But,even if I mention Aneela’s name in passing,she starts her narrative- Auntie..gibberish..Baby,dudu peeta…Aadya turn,Nani,uncle chokie Givmi….So,we cannot take Aneela’s name in vain around here.
I have always said Aadya is a very sensitive child.And as she is growing getting more sensitive.Her eyes tear up,when she sees another child crying..or if one of us is upset.If one of us is angry,she keeps calling out to us sweetly,till we don’t smile.If someone storms out to the other room,she goes after that person..talking sweetly,patting whichever part of the body she has access too..saying “Isshokay,Aadi Hiya(here)”..who can stay mad or upset after that reassurance.
Aadya is so in love with babies.She gently kisses them on their forehead,wants to pick them dodi(AadyaSpeak for=pick me up).She is also in love with her various soft toys too.She calls the smaller teddies Puppy-Don’t ask me why.So, each teddy or Puppy gets its turn to be pampered.They get read to,they get fed,put to sleep.She dances with them,urging them to put their feet on the ground..its fun to watch..She even blows raspberries.But its no fun,blowing raspberries on teddies,so thats when mummy is called in,shirt is promptly raised and raspberries blown on Mumma-tummy.Sometimes I wonder who the child is..It fills my heart with a mish-mash of happy and sad..:)
A couple of weeks and she will be two.Its just not fair,that just like that my baby is a toddler now and even acts all grown up…:(
Hello Hello Everyone.I am just stopping by to say a quick hello and to tell you that all’s well here.We are almost at home in the new house.Finally got the internet connection today and the phone should start working from tomorrow.Aadya loves running around.The first thing she does when she wakes up is to run to the front door and look out the glass panel.Rest of the day just goes by..running and playing .I am not in a rush to unpack this time..all the bags and boxes have been stacked in one room and we are going one room at a time.
We have already entertained two sets of house guests and had some people come over for lunch.S drives to city everyday and so far he hasn’t complained.And I don’t think he will too,considering moving here was his idea.
We have almost finalised on a day-care cum montessori for Aadya and she will start school in a week or two.
On the weight front there is good news-
I have lost 2.8 kgs so far.i hope to lose another kg till Aadya’s birthday on the 30th.Resh,Sraikh..thanx for checking.
Regular blogging will resume soon.